They Have Moved On

I had a short but interesting SMS chat with Boy L a few nights ago. I had text him to ask which secondary school he is in (must be sensitive - did not ask what score did he and his friends achieve for PSLE exam results) and how did the rest fare? Boy M is the one on the left, text him too but he did not reply and mysteriously, I thought I did save Miss A's mobile number but I couldn't find it in my mobile.

He replied on which school he is in currently and told me he had joined table tennis and rugby as sports. He continued to say "I'm working very hard now." which is such a heart-warmer. He told me that Boy M "got lower than me" and barely scrapped through to go to the regular stream 'academic' instead of 'normal' (which is a 5-year program, instead of 4 years).

Miss A has failed 1 subject and her only options were to repeat for another year or drop out of school. She chose to drop school to pick up some other skills outside of school.

Boy L was sweet enough to ask about Aidan, as he thought Aidan had started Primary School this year. He was heading back to school on Friday and asked if I would be there, and I told him the twins are due anytime and he ended our conversation with "I wish you the best of luck. Bye." Haha, I wonder if that's the way 13 year olds talk nowadays.

The 301st post

3 years from when I started this blog, we have 300 posts here!

The contents of this 301st post happens to come from my other half. Got his permission to publish this, since it was from an email he sent to his family on his thoughts of parent volunteering and his experience.

Job scope? Traffic warden and recess duty. The jobs aren't hard, it was harder begging for work to do, rather than doing them.

"Update on being a traffic warden.

Monday morning – Raining like mad, trafiic was bad, worst traffic day in Singapore. Was in a rain coat diverting traffic in school.Think I am a talented traffic warden. (my note: the school we volunteer at has only a 1-way lane for each direction outside its main gate. Traffic flow is indeed horrendous even at after school hours, where some kids stay back and go back at different timings. Think about the traffic flow when everyone has to report to school by 7.30am + apparently inconsiderate parents who only bother to ensure their kids reach school, safe and dry by parking at school bus bays) Interesting experience.

Was at school to help out during recess time as well. Helping kids with their lunch and helping the teachers get them organized. The kids now are really not shy, very outspoken and you can easily pick out the cheeky, naughty ones from the crowd. Today a boy told me, “ Uncle I put a bomb in your pants and blow up your balls … “ I was amused but dumb struck for a moment.

Anyway, I found this volunteer a good experience, will help me to prepare Dan for his start of school.

a) Need to teach him to buy his own food, prepare him mentally and teach him how to make choices, he needs to choose his recess lunch. Hope he does not eat chicken rice everyday.
b) Need to teach him how to deal with bullies and kids who are much more aggressive and over friendly.
c) Need to remind him to follow his class and teachers, as most of the children tend to wonder off and split from the classes.
d) Need to teach him what to do if he spills his food on the floor, on his shirt, get scolded by teacher etc.
e) Need to teach him how to react and what to do if he falls down and hurt himself.
f) Need to teach him to have his own thoughts and not just follow the crowd.
g) Need to teach him not to be so shy and be “too good a boy” … (I think I need to start his soccer soon, he needs some rough and tumble --- quite worried he will be too shy in school)
h) Need to teach him how to pick his friends and how to say no. How to hang around friends he is comfortable with, at the same time, not making too many enemies. How to stay friendly with everyone even if he does not necessary like them … (my note: in other words, how to play 'poker face', not easy!)
i) Need to teach him to greet his teachers and not be afraid to speak out, and how to react if he is reprimanded for nothing (it sometimes happens in school , some teachers quite fierce and tough)
j) Need to teach him how to enjoy his school and friends … not be afraid of the new environment.
k) Need to give him the confidence to succeed and do well …
l) Need to teach him how to handle disappointment, when things do not go his way and as he expected (again, have to be through team sports so he knows the feeling of winning and losing) … so he can cope with the “unplanned” surprises in school.

Our little boy is growing up so fast that I miss him already. Our little prince.

Really have to let him enjoy himself this year. How I hate my first day in school."

Yo-Yo

We all know Yo-Yos in.

One of those days when I was doing my coaching, the boys whipped out their Yo-yos to play while I checked their work.

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Boy M says: My yo-yo is nothing lah. You must look at LX's one.

Me: Ya, why LX's one has 2 colours?

Boy M: Because people rich mah! His one is limited edition. The pink side costs $60, the blue side costs $70, total $130, OK!

Me: Oh, that is the Super Yo-Yo?

Boy LX: Please lah! That's lousy. This is Yo-Yo Jam. My friends and I queued up at 9.30a.m., the shop opens at 10a.m. and I managed to get the last one. The shop only has 5, ok!
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$130! To think I used to think for a week when I had to spend $158 on a handbag when I started working.

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The following week, Boy LX has new strings for his yo-yo. I didn't dare to ask him what much it costs but I did threaten to cut his strings if he doesn't finish his work in front of me. It worked, so the string must have cost a significant amount of $.

Random Conversations II

More random conversations I had with 12 year-olds. By the way, the group grew larger, with 1 boy volunteering to stay back to join his friend who is in my group and Boy L asking to join on a Friday session which he wasn't scheduled to. I must be providing some entertainment value, even if their grades don't improve.

#1: Best Ah-Lian in Town

Boy M: See, A is not here yet, right? She's still talking on her phone at the canteen.

Boy L: She's the most Ah-Lian girl in the school. She doesn't listen to anyone at all.

Boy M: Ya, probably in the whole Singapore and JB; and some say Batam! (all bursts out laughing)

#2 - Name your child well

Miss A: Eh, everyone, here comes duck meat!
(Girl and her friends walk into the library)
Miss A: Yo, 鸭肉! Here is not the market, come here do what?
Me: Why you so bad, go and call people names?
Miss A: What! Her name is really 'Ya Rou' what. She's from China anyway. Her full name is 'Ting Ya(2) Rou(2) but spelling same as duck meat mah!
Boy M: Her mother must be called 鸡肉.
Miss A and Boy M: Duck meat, is your mother call 'chicken meat'? Hahahaha!

Just like this, the poor girl and her friends vacated the library after a mere 5 minutes. Part of growing pains... poor girl.


#3 - Favourite numbers

Me: Ok, which of this is not a prime number? Someone answer me, please. Eh, do you all know what is a prime number or not?
Boy L: I only know '69' is the most popular number. Should be prime lah, with everyone. Hahahaha!
(All the boys giggle)
Me: Why are you so dirty-minded?!

#4 - and the dirty jokes continue...

Me: Hey, I tell you all what. You all concentrate and don't give me trouble for the next 2 hours and also for tomorrow's session, then I treat you all to pizza next week after PSLE, ok?
Boy M: Anything, I just don't eat sushi or sashimi.
Me: Ok, or if you all like anything else I bring to school as a treat next week lah.
Boy L: I like to eat donuts, because there is a hole in the middle.
Boy M: Hahaha! That's a good one! Hahahaha!

And that was the last week of my sessions with the students as the exams have ended and they no longer need tuition.

I brought them pizzas today, sent them to the school before I arrived. It was quite touching that Miss A rang me and asked me if I was going to join them. I told them I will be late and to start eating first and the boys and her said they would wait. After that, they thanked me together and that felt good to know the kids aren't bad inside. They just needed a little attention and someone to talk to.

The Ultimate Student - Part 2

I am glad I am not getting paid to tutor the Primary School kids; or else I might get the chance to be fired by the students, especially students like Miss A.

She was extremely unhappy to see me appear in front of her when I should be the one, after having to wobble around the school premises hunting for her since she did not appear at the designated meeting point to report for tuition.

A: Why are you here again? Can you go to the library first?
Me: It is Wednesday and your exams are next week. Mrs Tan told me to look for you.
A: OK, I'm coming. (fidgets with her mobile - with ear phones still on). Can you go first?
Me: No, I'm waiting for you here and we can go together
(Come on, I'm 32 this year, right? I should be wise enough to know I'd probably have to make another trip back to the basketball court to summon her again - that is if she has not decided to go into hiding).

A: Can you don't stand so close to me?
Me: I don't care, I'm standing in front of you until you move.
A: I haven't ate my lunch yet.
Me: Just too bad. You had your chance to eat earlier. (figured she won't die from skipping a meal and also since she told me last week that she was scared of getting fat)
Miss A starts to pack up her ear-phones. She rolled her eyes, muttered the word 'F***' while her 2 girlfriends sat on the bench and stared at me.

Into the library, after dragging her feet and being at least 30 steps behind me - a preggie wobbling with pelvis girdle pain and a bulging stomach - she chose a table and slammed her schoolbag onto the table. That table, was at least 8 metres (5 tables length) away from where I was sitting.

She threw me a dirty look again, and I was almost up to my neck with her Attitude with a Capital A, so I told her: "You don't have to give me that look. The simple fact is that if you don't start any sooner with your worksheet, then you go home later." (I wanted to add: I am not here to take your stupid attitude and I don't owe you anything; but of course, I couldn't say that out)

Miss A took her worksheets out, shifted her chair so that she was behind a CD rack and she achieved her goal - I couldn't see a thing except for her legs and a right elbow sticking out.

So Preggie had to walk over twice, to check on her progress and when I asked her if she had problems, she kept quiet. So I repeated my question again, and she returned it with a loud "NO!".

As I sat with Boy E, I noticed that her friends came into the library to join her but since she still had a pen in her hand and writing away while chatting, I left them alone. After Boy E went home, I moved my things and sat next to her.

A (to her friends): Eeee... my bag is dirty! The apple pie leaked, now I have sauce inside my bag. Time to get a new bag!
Friend: Can't you go home and wash the bag?
A: I don't like dirty things, I will just buy new one instead. Time to go shopping!
Me: How come your Mummy let you buy new things just like that? She never ask you why you need it?
A: Come out with excuse lah! (points to her white purse) Like this one, I've been thinking of an excuse to change it, it's a little bit dirty already.
Me: Then what do you do with the old things? Still can use, right?
A: Put at home lah! I mostly ask my Dad, he sure give me money most of the time. You know ah, 1 month I can ask him for about $500 to go shopping.

Half an hour went by, and I checked her completed work. Found the following which took me a few seconds to understand why Miss A used her pen to write on the text area which did not ask for answers, turns out that she had been spending time writing cr*p to amuse herself!

We ended the session by me reminding her that I'll see her on Friday. "Huh! Somemore? Again? I hope I won't see you on Friday. Hope you get cough, fever and flu. Maybe you go and break your leg also?" By this time, I was almost drained of rational and sensible words to use on her so I just kept quiet and watched her flee out of the library like she's just been released from the Communicable Disease Center.

The Ultimate Student

Meet the ultimate student with the Capital 'A'. Well, her first name starts with 'A' as well, but this 'A' I'm bestowing on her stands for ATTITUDE.

She was told by her form teacher, discipline mistress and Principal last week to stay back after lunch for remedial. She even borrowed money from the teacher to eat lunch and then did the disappearing act and never appeared for remedial classes after that.

Today, I finally got to meet the legendary Miss A. The regular boys whom I taught shook their heads when I told them to look for A since I didn't know how she looked like.

Turned out she looked pretty normal. A 12 year old girl, with 2 plaits on her side and was hanging out with 2 other girlfriends at the side of the basketball court.

In order to get her moving, I encouraged her friends to join us in the classroom to finish their homework, with the promise - "No, you two can leave anytime. Mrs Tan only said A has to stay back till 5pm."

As the clock ticked, I was soon left with A and Boy L. Despite the fact that Boy L was his usual careless self and wrote with half his body twisted at a 45 deg angle and half a butt off the seat, he actually did work.

Ms. A wrote her worksheet in pencil, so faint that I with 6/6 eyesight could hardly read. After she completed her paper, she wanted to leave. I told her it was not time yet and I want to go through her answers with her. She started to sulk.

Hence, it was time to whip out another 'talk cock' session in order to get her to warm up.

Me: Wow, you have 2 ear holes on each ear! How cool. Did you do it recently?
A: Ya, very cheap only what. $5 1 side. I even have 1 up here - she pointed to the top of her ear where the cartilage is.
Me: Oh, but that part is very hard to maintain, right? It heals very fast. You didn't put a stick through it, has it closed?
A nodded: Yah, very easy to close.
Me: So what did your parents say when you pierced more than 2 holes?
A: Nothing.
Me: Nothing? Your Mummy, what did your Mummy say?
A: She asked me why I did it. I told her I can do anything I want, it's my ears, not hers.
Me: Ooohhh.... then what did your Daddy say?
A: My father ah, I don't think he even knows.

Boy L started talking about having signed a contract with his eldest sister, that if he gets into a good secondary school next year; and she passes her driving test, she will send him to school every morning. Miss A got all excited about looking at the scribbled words and kept saying it is so cool.

Me: How about you? Which secondary school you want to go to?
A: Never think about it but sure go to Normal Academic lah.
Boy L: My parents want me to go to ACSI but I don't like. I want to go elsewhere.
Me: How about your parents then, A?
A: They say as long as I can get into secondary school, they are happy already. (I was quite relieved to hear that, and glad that she isn't suffering from any pressure from her parents to perform well)

The 2 then decided they wanted a break.

A was about to walk out and I said be back in 10 minutes. She told me: "I will forget one. Can't you see I don't wear a watch?"
Me: You have been holding onto your mobile since the moment I saw you at the basketball court. Surely it has a clock, right?
A: Why don't you ring my handphone when you want me to come back? You check my work first, if got problem then you ring me, ok? You take down my number now, can?
Me: No. I am not ringing you. You come back here yourself in 10 minutes.

A sulked even more. Anyhow, just in case, I did take down her mobile in case she disappeared into thin air again.

After a walk around the school and having to round up the 2 lost sheeps, we were back in the classroom doing corrections for the exam papers. A had an atrocious amount of errors (and this is English) and Boy L finished his part earlier than her hence I dismissed L first.

A: Not fair!
Me: What is not fair? He already stayed back 15 minutes later than he was told to. Your time is not up yet.
A slammed her pen down.

Me: What's wrong?
A: I don't want to do corrections, ok? I know which are the right answers, I just don't want to circle them.
Me: Why not? You are such a smart girl, if you know the answers then quickly circle and then you can go home.
A: What's the point? The teachers won't check again one. They don't care.
Me: They don't care, never mind. You do now so I can make sure you know what is right.
A bent over and hugged her bag. She looked away and put her head on the table: "I say not doing means not doing."

We went silent for a few minutes before I told her: "Eh, as long as you don't do, you are not going anywhere. Mrs Tan said 5pm, you just pushed it to 5.05pm. You wait somemore, you can go home at 6pm."

Miss A straightened her back, grabbed her pencil and started to cross out the wrong answers angrily and circled the correct one. She made it a point to flip the pages loudly and slamming the table as she put her arms down.

"Fine. Move on. Next one, question 13 is also wrong," I told her. She went on her pencil-arm slamming spree halfway through the paper until she had to open her mouth to utter: "I don't know the answer for this one." As I did my explanation, she calmed down a bit but still had this angry look on her face and mumbled: "I hate this school. I wish I am not from this school because they send me for these stupid classes like these."

When things are finally over, she literally flew out of the classroom while I reminded her that I will be seeing her in 2 days' time. She groaned and moaned but her legs never stopped walking towards the door.

Boy, and I thought only boys are difficult to manage. I came home and googled the meaning of her name, because she is the 1st and only person I know with that name and I wanted to be sure I named my twins correctly, should the meaning of the name come true.

Turns out Miss A is a 'She who shall be loved'; and I think it's very true. She's got a Sony Ericsson flashy pink mobile phone, perpetually stuck to her hand while I have never seen a mobile phone so far with the kids I have worked with. She told me her daily pocket money is $10 a day which I think is enough to feed 4 more of her classmates during recess time. And after she left, it struck me that why would a little rich girl like her tell her teacher last week she didn't have any money to eat her lunch?!

Definitely made my regular boys look like angels; and as a friend put up on Facebook recently: 'When life's problems seem overwhelming, look around and see what other people are coping with. You may consider yourself fortunate'; and I am glad again I don't have to go through school and honestly, what will this girl do after her exams in 2 weeks' time? I was told she obtained 18/100 for her English prelim and I could quite easily see why after working through a mock paper with her today.

Conversations

Random excerpts from conversations I had with 12 year old boys, during a session of remedial/problem solving lessons.

(1) Twins story
Boy E: Why is your stomach so big?
Me: Because I'm pregnant.
Boy E: Oh, you are going to have a baby. Boy or girl?
Me: girls.
Boy E: girlS?
Me: Yes, i'm going to have 2 girls. (me thought: not sure if they know the term 'twins')
Boy E & Boy L: Oh, say 'twins' lah!
Boy L: We have twins in school. I can tell all the twins apart.
Boy E: I know, I can too! That xx and yy sisters - 1 of them hair short, the other hair long mah! (me thought: ?????? then one day both cut short hair how?)
Boy L: No lah, you stupid! You look closely, you can tell one! the face is slightly different.
Me: Ok, ok, please get back to your homework.

(2) A Bet
Me: Ready to go to the library?
Boy L: I left my worksheets upstairs, they are not in my bag.
Me: Ok, then you go and take. I wait for you here.
Boy L: Upstairs leh.. in my house. I need to go home to take.
Me: WHAT!?! Go home? Where is your home? Now what time already?!
Boy L: Relax lah, my house only opposite. I cross the road only.
Me: Are you sure? You sure you will come back to school ah?
Boy L: Yes, I go now. I will come back. Just take worksheets only.
Me: If you don't turn up and reach back by 2p.m., I will look for Mrs Tan and tell her you are missing.
Boy L: Ok, ok. I'm going now.

(inside library)
Boy E: You let L go home? You die man.
Me: Why?
Boy E: You got cheated. He sure won't come back wan.
Me: Sure, or not?
Boy E: I bet with you $1, if he doesn't come back by 2.3op.m. you give me $1.
Me: Aaahhh... just do your work, I don't make bets.

(2p.m., Boy L strolled into the library)
Me: Ha! He came back! You lost! Give me $1.
Boy E: No, no, no, I don't have the money.
Me: Then don't make bets with people next time. It's not good. Do your work.

(3) Negotiation
Boy L: I don't want to do this, it's too easy for me.
Me: Too easy? Then how come last week you told me you failed English?
Boy L: ......
Me: Ok, you try to do this page. If it's easy, you can finish in less than 5 minutes.
(Boy L read the paper and got out of his seat)
Me: What are you doing? Can you please sit down?
Boy L: I can do also, when I'm standing up. (He moved to the opposite side of the table and faced his worksheet upside down)
Me: You please write the answers properly ah, it's just MCQ (multiple choice questions). Write the numbers in each bracket.
Boy L started writing while having his worksheet upside down. Answer '2' became a deformed 'S'.
Me: Oi! What are you writing. You'd better sit down. You can't even write '2' properly. Please lah, come on, just 5 MCQs, surely you can sit down here and write, right?
Boy L: Cannot, I need to stretch my legs or else I cannot think.

(4) Distractions
Boy E: I didn't bring my calculator today.
Me (pull out handphone): Ok, never mind. My handphone has calculator. You tell me your workings, I key in for you.
Boy E: Wah, your handphone very cool. Is it a touch-screen?
Me: No.
Boy E: Can I take a look?
Me: No. So, what are the numbers you want to calculate?
Boy E: Why didn't you get a touch-screen phone? I think they are really cool.
Me: Auntie can't use touch-screen, I need buttons to press. Quick, what are the numbers you want to key?
Boy E: Does it have a camera?
Me: Yes, yes, it does. Very good camera. Can you please concentrate?
Boy E: Can you take a picture to show me?
Me: No! Eh, I am only using this phone now for 'calculator' function, ok? Where are your numbers?

Boy L: I can't think at all!
Me: Why? What's wrong now?
Boy L: Can't you hear it? There's the boy outside, he keeps banging the basketball against the fence!
Me: Yes, but it's not that loud.
Boy E pitched in: It's none of your business. People has the right to play outside the library.
Boy L: I'm distracted. (puts down his pen) I can't write at all. I'm distracted by the sound outside. I'm distracted by that group over there (some teacher/ students discussion 2 tables away from us), I'm distracted by the people coming in and out the library door.
Me: You are exaggerating. E can do his work, other people at other tables also can, why can't you?
Boy L: I can't, just can't. (covers his ears) Can you ask the boy outside to stop playing?
Me: I can't lah, why should I?
Boy L: You have the right to.
Me: No, I don't and he is free to play ball outside.
Boy E: She is not a teacher, ok? She cannot tell people to stop playing basketball.
Me: Ok, E, can you please continue with your work?
Boy L: I need a quieter room. Can we go to the room behind? There is 1 room at the back of the library.
Me: You sure, got room? Ok, we can try. (prepares to pack up to move)
Boy L: Yah, but you must go and ask Mrs Tan for permission first and then take the key if she says OK.
Me: Mrs Loh is in a meeting now, how to ask?
Boy L: Just go and knock the door and interrupt lah!
Me: Please, your case is not that urgent. We will continue here. Next week you bring your ear phones and wear over your ears.
Boy L: You are giving permission to bring my ear-phones?!!
Me: I said ear-phones only, no plug-ins to any equipment. So the wire just hang here on the table, ok? Or else music is also considered noise, distraction for you mah.
Boy L: No lah, cannot. I will bring my PSP.
Me: No ah, I said only 'ear-phones', no PSP or walkman or whatever. (gosh, I didn't know what they use nowadays, iphone/nano/shuffle?)
Boy L: Yay, now I can do my work. Next week I will bring ear-phones to cover the noise.

For the 2 hours I spent with these 2 boys, I drained my brain juice more on conversations with them and trying to bring their attention back to their worksheets. I met 'Circles - areas, circumference and radius' and 'pie a.k.a 3.14 a.k.a 22/7' but that was manageable. English was a little more challenging than I expected - they are supposed to know substituitable words/ meanings for 'elusive' and 'morsel' and digest a sample of an advertisement as part of a comprehension.

Reminds me again of the 'ordeal' of growing up. Found Boy E had lots of careless mistakes and I can only imagine my kids doing the same thing. But again, am I glad I have the chance to experience and foresee what to expect in a few years' time.

Back to School - Ep. 1

This week, I volunteered my spare time at a Primary school. I don't want to name the school, nor go into details on why and how I got into doing this. Local parents who have toddlers and my close friends would know, but I'll leave it here. I only want to share my experiences online because I felt it brought refreshing changes to my weekly routine and gave me new perspectives to 'the world out there'.
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2 hours in school, and I met some old friends. Meet: 'Rhombus', 'Parallelogram' and 'Trapezium'.

They hopped right out from a P6's workbook and gave me a fright of my life. Why? Because my job is to supervise 3 boys through their homework and coach them when they have problems - and I haven't seen 'Rhombus' and its friends for 20 years, or more? What are their properties? Which sum of angles make up 180 degrees? Which opposite angles are equal, since the lines are parallel in some shapes?! I was slightly relieved to see the more familiar 'isoceles triangle'.

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Within 5 mins, Boy E told me he's stuck and needs help. I took big gulp, stared at his Rhombus (ABCD) overlapping a Parallelogram (EFGH) and find angle AFC & angle BGH - and I begin to panic. Well, the feeling was very close to going for a Science exam and realising you have prepared for Geography instead. Told myself to calm down and I asked E for his textbook (which they call it 'coursebook' now) to quickly refresh myself with the properties. OK, problem solved... and I felt useful and smarter... already!

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I offered the boys sweets, while going through their work with them. Got an answer by one of them: "Oh, I don't do sweets. Do you have anything else?". Woah.... 'coursebook', 'do sweets'.... I felt like a dinosaur instantly.

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Next topic - length x breath x height. Find the new height after additional volume of water is added into a tank. There are 2 ways to solve this - either you divide the additional volume by area, to get the new height and add it to the existing height; or you add the total volume together, divide by area and obtain the new height. Boy L was debating with me which way is correct. I told him Maths is a 'live' subject, you can solve it many ways; it's the workings that count. Told him it's just like eating chicken rice, some people start with the chicken, while some people start with rice. He looked at me and said "But for me, when I eat chicken rice, I eat both together." Shucks.... guessed I picked a lousy metaphor to get my point through.

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I was left with Boy L after E and C went home early. He was a little down, sulked after the teacher left the room because he felt that he was misunderstood for his 'behavior' problems. Strangely, he reminds me a lot of Aidan, his features and his hairstyle. I told Hubby I could almost see how Aidan would look like in 7 years' time! He started packing up his books, when it wasn't time to go yet.

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"Er, it's not time yet. We haven't finished, you know. Why are you keeping your things?", I asked.

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"What's the point? Study so much for what? Everyone thinks I am a trouble maker." He replied.

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There and then, Tuition Supervisor turned into Aunt Agony.

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I got him to talk, asked him a few questions about himself and what he likes and dislikes about school. He mentioned people who are greater bullies than him (he was caught shooting staple bullets across the class - I was amused actually. Must be fun!), but he always seem to be the one who got caught and punished. I tried to put through why it is important for him to complete the basics, like his homework, because no one can help him more than himself. It's only 4 more months to his major assessment exam (PSLE - Primary School Leaving Examinations) and that affects whether he can get into his ideal secondary school.

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I asked him what he does after school, he said "nothing, so I stay back in school to play basketball". 2 sisters are 6 and 7 years older than him, he doesn't see much of his parents on weekdays "because they come back only after I sleep" and "sometimes I get scolded when they never sign the papers because I never see them" and he has to buy his dinners on the days his sisters don't cook.

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We continued with 'Aural' practice. Dig this man, there are 'Aural' textbooks now, with pictures for school children to practice speaking and paragraphs for them to practise reading out loud. We went through 'a diving experience' and 'a visit to the zoo'. I read the teacher's note - I'm supposed to prompt and ask questions.

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So I asked the most basic one: "Have you been to the zoo?". He replied: "No."

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"Huh! Singapore zoo, Mandai zoo, you never go before ah? How can it be?" I blurted out.

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"Hmm... let me think. Got lah, once... school bring me. School excursion go there."

h

I bit my lip and my first thought was, how bloody lucky my kids are.

w

At the end of my 2 hours, I felt I learnt more than I probably gave to the boys. Their constant bickering, calling each other nicknames, snatching each other's calculators and coursebooks to use, pressure from teachers and comparisons of behaviour with classmates, having homework to complete, are all part of growing up. I'm glad I am a part of it because I can anticipate what my little ones would be going through, and I think I can help. Personally, I am glad I'm just growing old.... these growing pains are just too painful to go through (again). Ouch.

A Mom's Reflection

On Tuesday evening, as I sat down at the table and picked up my pen, I couldn't help feeling that the whole scenario at that moment was just so ironic and yet surreal.

Instead of living my time out at the office, I was sitting at a community centre on a weekday afternoon. Instead of spending my time with Am at home, or even with both of my kids, I brought along my laptop and some 'paperwork' to complete. How did I end up there? Because The Prince was attending class at Berries, a Chinese enrichment school for young children. While waiting for him to finish his class, I'm carefully filling up a 'Parent Volunteer' form which I wanted to submit to his potential (a.k.a his parents' ideal) primary school by the end of the week.

Everything I have noted above, was something I'd never imagine I will be doing as a parent. I've stepped down from a full-time job to a part-time one. I'm sending my son to enrichment classes to give him more exposure to the Chinese language while I used to chastise parents who send their kids to endless Kumon/Shichida/Phonics/ Language classes during their children's free time.

The ultimate step taken to this stage would really be how we have started planning to get the kids into a decent primary school. Moving to get within 1Km of your targeted school is an arm-breaking move, actually make that 2 arms-2 legs-breaking and a literally heart-stopping move. Hence, the next best thing? Apply to be a parent volunteer so that you get equal chances to have the chance to ballot (i.e. need the element of luck!) for your kid to get into the school.

When I heard my colleague doing that 5 years ago, I rolled my eyes, gawked and exclaimed it was bloody ridiculous how much some parents are willing to work hard, in order to give their kids the best. 5 years later, I have gotten the same expressions and all those head-shakings coming from friends, particularly those who don't have children yet. What goes around, really comes around!

The form fillings were challenging. You are supposed to sell yourself as much or even more than a job interview, to the school. Same concept from the school/ employer - you are the one who wants the position badly; we have plenty to choose from so we can pick who we want. You must have the right skills set and we expect total commitment from the selected candidate.

Initially Hubby and I were at a loss, 10 years out of Uni, 19 years out of primary school - what are normal adults (excluding the teachers) supposed to do in a school? Man the food stall at the canteen? Clean the toilets? Jaga the cars that are coming into the school compound and ensure they don't park illegally? Ensure the PA system is working so that the national anthem can be blasted loud enough until those 'truly lucky' ones who stay right across the school can also hear it every morning?

Then, the ideas started flowing, also with a little help from my online research and the categories the school listed in their forms. We found out that, as a couple with multiple talents and the right attitude, we could:

1. Do coaching for sports - Mommy was happy to list 'swimming' since she had been a school swimmer and had won a few medals here and there. Nothing much really, you can get those medals from Queensway shopping centre for a few bucks and engrave your own sports and even choose your preferred colour - gold, silver or bronze. At least that was what I started to feel after I stumbled upon a shop like that many years ago. (By the way, Jack-of-All-Trade Dad was too 'humble' to volunteer to coach anyone in any sports. "Come on, I can play badminton, tennis, table-tennis, volleyball, soccer, all sports really, dear.")

1. Events & Seminars - arranging tables and chairs, we can do that, of course! Hang banners, test PA systems? Bring it on! Pack event bags, print posters and paste them around the school, we have 2 pair of hands ready to go. I even volunteered to source for relevant speakers to invite to the school's workshops and seminars. (If you know of friends who are going to volunteer for the same school, please don't share these points with them. I need to fight off the competition in order to get selected for the interview session... yep, interview. Dress Code - TBC).

1. Others - naturally, this was where we had the longest entry. We couldn't contribute in the categories of 'landscaping & gardening' and 'aesthetics - play piano for choir or teach dance' so we made up by desperately listing everything that didn't come under those. Direct traffic around the school during peak hours? Can do. Will do. Able to do. Both of us are drivers, we can tell the green lights from the red. Chaperon students on school field trips? No problem, already having on-the-job training at my son's nursery school. Help Primary 1 students settle down in school - sure, I am confident I will be able to perform as I am physically bigger and taller than the masses in school so I will be able to get more respect and help the children buy their food during recess period. Sew for performers for choir or dance (I thank my Home Economics O-levels training for this one. I can guarantee the skirt will stay on for at least half a day) and make-up services, if required for the performers. I've been slapped on with bright red circles on my cheeks and blue-black patches around my eyelids during my school days, surely it's time for me to contribute, "do breakthrough work" and make the children look more natural and not like they are performing on the stage during the 7th (ghost) month.

So, to my friends whom I have shared that I was going to opt for volunteer work, I did meet deadline and submitted my forms last week. Just like any 'I-am-sure-I'm-the-one-they-are-looking-for' job, it will take ages for the organisation to get back to you. For us, we know it will be November, when they will carry out the shortlisting process - for the interview, only. The school will then decide to give you either a good Christmas present or a bad way to start 2009 by informing you whether you have been selected as a PV or not, in December.

During the time between now and 2010 (the year of registration), I can only pray hard that we get in as a PV, we fulfill our volunteer duties without getting the sack; win lottery so we can get an additional chance of buying an apartment that is a stone's throw away from the school, that the school doesn't change to a single sex school, or they move premises to the other side of the island.

The things we do for our kids.

P/s: we are mentally prepared for our kids to attend the newly established school which is right across my Mom's place. It's so close that we can hear the National Anthem and the teacher calling for "Class 2C to stand in line". It isn't a bad idea really, if Aidan can top the class at "what's-the-name-of-the-school-again?" Primary School, then get position #30 out of a class of 30 in "Oh-you-were-ex-girl-ah, how-did-you-manage-to-a-spot-there?" Primary School.